Blog
Blog Posts from our licensed mental health therapists - free mental health and therapy thoughts.
Feeling lonely on Valentine’s Day? You are not alone.
I know that feeling lonely can be incredibly difficult and painful, but I want you to know that you are not alone in your experience. So many of us have felt this way at one point or another, and it's okay to feel this way. Loneliness is not a reflection of your worth or value as a person. It's simply a feeling that we all experience from time to time. And while it may feel overwhelming right now, remember it is a temporary feeling and you will get through it.
You are loved and valued, and you deserve to experience happiness and fulfillment. You've got this.
Does online therapy really work?
In online therapy, you get to be yourself. You can show up with your cozy blanket, your dog on your lap, and your favorite mug full of tea. When you get to know each other, the feeling of being virtual drops away. You can build a relationship virtually with a therapist just as well as in-person.
How to Reduce Anxiety Around Finances
If you ever think “I just want to be able to spend my money without feeling guilty” or “I just want to be able to pay my bills and have money left over to do the things I want to do” you’re in the right place. Keep reading as we answer the questions we get most and by the end of this post, we’ll leave you with a doable challenge you can take to move in the right direction financially.
Before You Start Therapy
You’ve done it. You’ve sent the email. Had the phone consultation. Filled out the paperwork. Now what? You felt compelled to reach out for therapy for a reason! REASON! You want (or NEED) something to change. You feel confident this was the right next step but now what? Your first session could be anywhere from a couple of days to a couple of weeks away. What are you supposed to do in the meantime while you are feeling depressed, hopeless, anxious, or restless?
How Are You?
We say “how are you” to the person checking us out at the grocery store, to a neighbor we pass by on a walk, and to our family and friends when we see them. If you’re struggling with depression or anxiety sometimes it might feel like a trick question. You might even be thinking, “Do they really want to know?”. When we are in the midst of a mental health struggle we often feel alone, like no one would ever understand. Some of us hide how we are feeling - silently suffering inside while everyone around us thinks we are fine. We all deserve support. We deserve to be able to open up with our most vulnerable feelings, fears, and thoughts. If you’re a client of mine, I’m 99% sure you’ve heard me tell you that you are not alone. I am serious - you are not alone. Not only has someone likely gone through something similar, those around you may be able to relate to what you’re going through more than you can imagine.
Comparing Our Suffering
“I don’t know why I’m complaining I don’t have it as bad as ____”. Sound familiar? It’s interesting how a coping mechanism we use is comparing how hard our lives are with someone else. Then we judge ourselves if we feel like we are reacting too big. We are quick to dismiss our feelings as “too much” or embarrassing. What does this do for us? The argument I hear often is that it helps put things in perspective but, what I often notice is that this leads to shame about our emotions.
The Pain of Counseling
There’s one thing in common with all of us when we go to counseling: we acknowledge something isn’t working. From symptoms like sadness, tearfulness, confusion, anxiety, or relationship issues we know deep down things need to change. Things aren’t working. Counseling helps us be honest with ourselves about what is going on. It can help us curiously explore patterns that are no longer working for us (things like avoidance or judgment). We can work towards trying something different. It will be hard - sometimes exhausting- but it will be worth it.
The Truth About Emotions
What if continuing to resist the hard emotions and feelings (sadness, anger, hurt, embarrassment, guilt) in our lives is leading to not being able to feel the emotions we want to feel. It feels counter intuitive to ask someone to dive deeper into the emotions they are feeling when everything in us is telling us to run. What if the answer is resting in those emotions, letting them shine and getting curious about what they are telling us.